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Read Navigating The Scale, by the mouth.
Making Out At The Movies You’ve heard about it. You’ve seen it on television. Hell, maybe you’ve even tried it yourself. It’s making out at the movies. I’ve only seen it once or twice in person and I’ve never attempted it. And that begs the question, who really makes out at the movies and why? I could only come up with a few reasons to actually make out at the movies. One, you are an exhibitionist. Do you like people to see you making out? Have you invited a friend to watch you have sex? Do you sometimes pull your balls out through your zipper and walk around until someone points it out? If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions, then you should probably also make out in the theatre. Another reason would be that you’re taking one for the greater good of mankind. Chances are that every couple in that theatre, at least the people sitting behind you, will notice your mauling. For those on a first date this provides an easy way to bring up making out and consequently make out later on. Your actions are simply a springboard for every other guy in that theatre to get action. If this is the case, thank you. And three, you just don’t have anywhere better to make out. This seems extremely unlikely, being that your car, your house, a bathroom, the woods, an alley, are all better places to make out. However, if you feel that your best chance is there in front of all those people, have at it. But ultimately, it’s just not worth it. I don’t believe people should make out in public, unless they’re very drunk or it is Spring Break. It’s just not polite. Not only that, but making out is generally just getting warmed up for other items. So, unless you’re planning on going outrageously far right there in the theatre, like second base or further, just save making out for later when you can really get down to business. *** Proper Bar Etiquette Hubs and I were spending some quality time at Rick's All-Star American Cafe & Bar on Saturday night. We were on the far side of the main bar when two hot blondes tap me on the shoulder, smile and ask, "Do you guys want to buy us some shots?" Without hesitation my response was, "Fuck No." Immediately following from Hub Nasty, "You're asking the wrong fucking guys." Then we told them to choose one of the 20 available cheese-dicks sitting around the bar...."they'll buy your fucking shots." Hubs continued, "Why don't you buy us shots instead?" She rambled and replied, "We would but my friend had my credit card and misplaced it and and ---" Cut off mid-sentence by Mullrod, "Yeah bitch, and I went to the moon last weekend and lost my credit card, too." The synopsis: These girls loved it. They were going from guy to guy across the bar poaching on free drinks then leaving those poor pathetic souls. Finally two guys treat them like shit (the right move) and they respond magically. Please keep these quotes in mind next time you're in this situation. Responding without hesitation is very crucial and could turn a pouty baby into real live sex-kitten. |